Growing up I always imaged my prince charming coming to
sweep me off my feet and lead me to happily ever after. Disney was my life and
I never saw any logical reason why I shouldn’t be a princess. That was when I
was 7.
When I was 10 I knew that I’d fall in love in high school.
It would be the type of fairy tale love that would last forever. We’d get married
after graduation and go to college together and I’d still get my happily ever
after.
I started high school when I was 15 years old and I had a
crush on a junior boy. I thought eventually he’d notice me and tell me I’m not
like all the other girls. Then we’d get married and live happily ever after. He
never did notice me. Shocker.
Junior year I fell in love. I never saw it coming. She was
my best friend. She was a she. Holy shit I’m gay. But it was ok, because I
loved her and she loved me. It wasn’t exactly the love I was expecting but it
was so much better. I never could have imagined what being in love was really
like until it actually happened to me. We were together for a year and a half
before we broke up.
The break up destroyed me. I was with this girl most of
junior and senior year. We talked about surviving long distance while in
college. We talked about how we’d eventually move in together, get married and
adopt kids. We even came up with names for those kids. We talked about all the
different places we’d live and travel to. I had stars in my eyes and when I saw
her I couldn’t help but smile.
She was the one.
And when it was over I thought so was everything else. I had
lost my one. My one person who would be my perfect other half for all of
eternity. I truly believed I would never feel that way again.
After a year I began to realize, there isn’t just one person
out there for everyone. I haven’t completely given up the idea of soul mates. I
do believe we are supposed to meet the people we meet and have the
relationships we have, but the soul mates in your life can change.
My high school girl friend was my soul mate from August 2012
to March 2014. We weren’t dating during all of that but she was my best friend
and my soul mate from the beginning.
My best friend junior year, senior year, and still to this
day is my soul mate. She stuck with me even when I pushed her away. She has
helped me pick up the pieces in my life.
My two roommates from my freshman year of college are my
soul mates. It’s because of them I know I picked the right college. They are
family to me.
So you see I’ve had many soul mates, and I will continue to
have many soul mates. Some will be lovers, and some will be friends. I will
continuously have so much love in my life thanks to the people, the soul mates,
who enter it.
I reject the notion that there is only one “the one.” I believe there are different “ones” for the
different times in your life. And yes there will eventually be a one who sticks
around for longer, but just because you lose someone that you loved with your whole
heart doesn’t mean you won’t find love again.
There’s not just one person out there for everyone. There
are many people out there for everyone.
I will find another one, and another one, and maybe another
one. I will find love again, but in the meantime, I can’t forget that I already
have it.
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