Reflection On My 2015 Goals

I had three goals for 2015, they were:

                                                   1.      Read more.

                                                   2.      Enjoy life.

                                                   3.      Study hard.

While these sound simplistic and not much of a challenge, they didn’t come easy to me. In fact I would say I only achieved one of these goals (Having read 30 books this year, I would count that as reading more). But the point of these goals was not to achieve anything. I wanted to spend 2015 improving myself, and self-improvement is something that continuously happens over a lifetime. I think what helps most with self-improvement though is reflection, so here is my reflection on my 2015 goals.

      1.      Read More: I am really proud of how much I read this year. Being a full time student takes a lot of time and I’m really glad I set aside time to read as much as I did. With this goal I really wanted to expand myself and explore through literature. I’m a notorious for re-reading (especially Harry Potter) and while that’s not a bad thing I wanted to branch out this year. As much as I love reading before this year I hadn’t read many books by my own choosing since before high school. It was fun rediscovering that love of reading and I want to keep it going.

      2.      Enjoy Life: I wouldn’t say I achieved this goal this year, but that’s not to say I failed completely. I can look back on 2015 and remember wonderful times and happy memories. But I also was depressed a lot and there were times I let that overcome me. The purpose of this goal was to try and help me push myself and not get stuck in my mind, but it was hard and I rarely succeeded. Therefore, I don’t count this goal as a success but something I will continue to work on.

      3.      Study Hard: Yes I passed all my classes, some just barely, but that’s not really good enough for me to consider this goal a success. I could have studied harder. I lost my focus, I procrastinated, and often I gave up. The purpose of this goal was to avoid all those things. Doing well in school is extremely important to me and I am disappointed in myself for how I did, particularly this last semester. I can only move forward though; therefore, I have to learn from this and use it as my wake up call. If I don’t study harder in the future I won’t be able to accomplish my long term goals.

Through reflection we can be proud of what we accomplished, learn from our mistakes, and figure out ways to improve. I look forward to 2016 to learn more lessons and to try to do better, and look back at 2015 with pride that I made it through. 

The 30 Books I Read in 2015

I was able to read thirty books in 2015, probably my biggest accomplishment. Although, my mother would say I should have spent more time studying. I did enjoy every book I read this year, but some really stood out to me. For my top 5 favorite books I read this year I will give you my reasons for loving it so much.

1.      The 5^th Wave*

2.      Yes, Please

3.      Dead is a Killer Tune

4.      Dead is Just a Dream

5.      We Should Hang Out Sometime

6.      Eleanor & Park

7.      Fangirl (Author: Rainbow Rowell) The main character Wren, and her twin sister Cath, are off to college and Cath wants to branch out, leaving Wren to feel left behind and unsure of where she belongs. Wren is a writer though, and spends most her time writing fanfiction, escaping into the world she created online. With the help of some new friends Wren slowly starts experiencing college and gets out of her shell. I love this book because the characters were so unique and relatable. I had friends my first year of college who helped pull my away from my laptop and push me out into the world and it was fun to see that reflected in Fangirl. Plus I love a good love story and all the allusions to Harry Potter.

8.      Attachments

9.      Me and Earl and the Dying Girl*

10.   I am Malala

11.   Warm Bodies*

12.   We All Looked Up

13.   Finding Audrey

14.   Geek Girl

15.   It’s Kind of a Funny Story* (Author: Ned Vizzini) This is the story of a boy Craig, who has been feeling pressure due to school and friends and family and became depressed. One night he considers killing himself and instead goes to the hospital and checks into the psych unit. Being in the psych unit he learns that he was unnecessarily putting pressures on himself and his self-worth isn’t determined by the prestigious school he goes to or his intellect. This story was inspired by the authors own hospitalization for depression. While most of the book focus on dark concepts it has a hopeful ending, and struggling with depression myself, I found it to be comforting. It looks at mental health in a real way that isn’t often portrayed in books or movies.

16.   All the bright places

17.   The Opposite of Loneliness

18.   The Astronaut’s Wives Club*

19.   The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up

20.   Carry On (Author: Rainbow Rowell) Simon Snow is a wizard who is trying to defeat an evil force. Basically Harry Potter with some twists. The fun thing about this book is in Rowell’s book Fangirl, the main character Wren, writes fanfiction about Simon Snow. Rowell took the book concept she created in Fangirl and wrote a whole book about it. There are so many things to love about this. I love the unexpected love story- it really knocked my off my feet. I love how it’s like Harry Potter in so many ways- give me a wizarding world and I’m happy. Most of all I love how originally it was just a small part of another story the author wrote and then she decided to fully create a book for the characters.

21.   Girl Online On Tour

22.   Life and Death

23.   Fun home** (Author: Alison Bechdel) This is an autobiography written in graphic novel form. It focus’s mostly on Bechdel’s childhood and what it was like for her to grow up.  The reason I love this book so much: Bechdel is a lesbian. There are so few stories out there about lesbians and I really love being able to relate to a character that way. My favorite parts of the story were about Bechdel’s first girlfriend. I always enjoy stories more when I can see myself in a character and that’s why I loved Fun Home so much.

24.   The Cuckoo’s Calling (Author: Robert Galbraith) A detective, Cormoran Strike, is asked to discover what really happened the night Lulu Landry, a famous model, died. This is a good old fashion crime novel and I couldn’t put it down. Also it should be noted that Robert Galbraith is a pseudonym for JK Rowling. Crime novels are so fascinating to me because I love getting the clues as you read and trying to figure out who did it.  

25.   Pride and prejudice*

26.   The Silkworm

27.   The Bad Beginning*

28.   The Reptile Room*

29.   The Wide Window*

30.   The Gospel According to Coco Chanel

*there is a movie/tv show modeled after these books

**there is a musical modeled after this book 

Adventure Day

During my fall break I was at school all alone, so naturally I went on a little solo adventure. In St. Louis there is a lovely park about 2 miles away from campus. It was a nice autumn day, not too cold, so I walked to the park. Within the park there are so many things to do, so I decided to go to the Art Museum. I had so much fun getting away from campus and going exploring. Here are some pictures from the day!

What's in My Bag: Adventure Day

Today I decided to go on a little adventure. Its fall break and I’m here in St. Louis by myself so I wanted to have some fun. Here’s what’s in my bag at the end of my adventure day!

First off, this is the bag I took. I borrowed it from my roommate. It’s a brown cross-body bag that can fit a ton of stuff!

So here is the breakdown of what I brought:

1.      My wallet and keys

2.      Vans beanie and Ray Bans

3.      Metro ticket and lunch receipt

4.      Poetry Books

5.      Composition book and pencils

6.      Map of art museum

7.      Polaroid camera and Polaroid pictures

8.      Headphones and case

9.      Tens Unit for back pain

10.   And obviously my iPhone

Well that’s everything I need for a trip to the park and art museum!

How To: Paint a Canvas

Maybe you are in a sorority for the first time, maybe you want to have cute decorations in your dorm room, or maybe you just want to paint for funsies. Crafting is a lot of fun no matter the reason. I am a recent crafter myself, but I thoroughly enjoy it and it’s one of my favorite things to do if I have some free time.

I know it can seem intimidating, but as long as you stay patient I promise you’ll do alright!

1.      Pick out a design/ Get painting supplies – you are going to need supplies like canvases, paint brushes and paints. If you know the design you’re going to do beforehand then you can make sure you get all the colors and supplies you need. You can either create your design yourself or copy a design. I always look to Pinterest for my inspiration!

2.      Get Started – Trace any designs and figures you want onto the canvas. I like to paint these in first before painting in the background.

3.      Paint the Background – Add the background color. As you do this you might color into your designs accidentally, that’s totally okay, just use a small paintbrush to paint over your little mistakes

4.      Add other paint details – for this canvas my last paint detail was the grass. This was something I just went for and didn’t have to worry about making it look perfect.

5.      Add paint pen details – I like to add paint pen details last after my paint has had time to dry. I use paint pen for lettering and more exact details of the canvas, like outlining the elephant and his eye.

There you have it! Canvas painting 101. Good luck on your future art endeavors!

Study Tips

So this weekend I am studying for three exams because it is midterm’s week. So I thought I’d procrastinate and write about good study habits or things to do to help you study.

1.     Make Lists: write down all the things you need to study/ homework assignments you need to do, that way you don’t forget anything

2.      Set a timer: Tomato timer is a great way to keep your productivity levels up. You do school work for 25 minutes and then give yourself a 5 minute break. Then keep repeating.

3.      Get Sleep: More than just the basic health reasons, your brain makes all your memories while you are sleeping, therefore it’s always good to get a good night’s sleep so your brain can remember all the facts you’ve been working hard to learn.

4.      Make Notecards: while this doesn’t apply to every subject, making notecards is great when you have to memorize lots of different facts or terms. Not only do you get to practice them easily, but the making of notecards and writing everything out helps you remember things better.

5.      Reward Yourself: Motivation gets you a long way. Tell yourself that you get to eat cookies or text a friend if you accomplish a certain amount of work.

6.      Turn off your Phone: make sure you are not getting distracted by texts, Facebook, twitter, Instagram or anything else. You learn material better if you stay focused on one task at a time. 

Good Luck on Exams!

Love is Louder

I’ve been struggling with mental illness for three years now. It sucks and there are some days I don’t have hope. Thankfully today is not one of those days.

Today I feel the support of my sisters. Today they give me strength and hope.

It’s a beautiful thing to know you are not alone in the world. While I hate knowing other people suffer as I do, it also brings me comfort. It brings me comfort to know I’m not making it up and this is real. It brings me comfort to know that other people understand. It brings me comfort to know that other people have survived this so I can too.

Today was Depression Screening Awareness Day. Reach out for support if you’re suffering. Even if you don’t seek professional help, confiding in friends or family can bring you comfort, and might even bring you a step closer to recovery.

Love is louder than the struggle that many face every day due to mental illness. I know what it’s like to fight a battle in your head every day. Reach out and talk to someone. And remember you are loved.